Week 7 Picks

I’m excited to kick off these picks with an announcement of a new award. The team that scores the most IDP points over the season will take home an autographed Greg Rousseau rookie card! Be the envy of your entire league - or just the Davises - with this beautiful card.

The wild thing about this card is that Rousseau’s autograph isn’t even close to the worst auto out there. The loss of cursive lessons in our schools has really destroyed the autograph. Kids now have phones and what not so they don’t have to kill time by trying out different signatures. Cam Ward and Emeka Egbuka just write their initials and call it an autograph. Sad days indeed.

Anyway, onto the picks1

GAME OF THE WEEK

Eli vs Andy
The Battle of the Dandyelions 2026! This isn’t the best game of the week but it’s the most clickbaity so we’re going with it!
Word is that Andy refused to be in even the same virtual room as his opponent this week which is why the podcast was a one man show. He is DIALED IN! Eli, on the other hand, is yet again without a full roster on Thursday. He has three guys missing on bye week although “missing” is way too generous when it comes to BTJ and Quentin being out this week. Eli’s $9 bid to bring back BTJ was wild but I didn’t realize that Thomas the Turd is on bye this week.
Watson doesn’t think much of Eli’s chances and I can’t say I disagree. I don’t think Eli will do as poorly as Watson is predicting but he simply doesn’t have enough firepower to match Andy’s plus matchups this week.
PICK: ANDY

UPSET OF THE WEEK

Grant vs. Player #14
Grant has been proving doubters wrong all season but if I’ve learned one thing in all of my years on Earth, it’s that I don’t learn my lesson so we’re doubting Grant again! I think the Dak/Fergie stack are going to pay dividends this week and I think the Jets target Garrett Wilson a healthy amount after he was overlooked last week. I don’t love picking a team that is starting Samaje Perine against Baltimore’s defense but Republicans are used to winning with ridiculous, unqualified candidates so this will be nothing new for The Veep.
PICK: PLAYER #14

THE REST

Nate vs Kevin
Am I going to get beat by CJ Stroud in back-to-back weeks? In the biggest subplot of the week, it seems like Nate and Dana are battling for Stroud, who is the best available QB on the waiver wire right now. If they miss, their options get dicier so my matchup this week could be decided by waiver wire auction.
That being said, things are just getting worse and worse for The Gentleman and. this week, he has a roster of bad matchups or banged up players so even if Dana does steal Stroud away from Nate, it might not matter.
PICK: NATE

Johnny vs. Nico
Fresh off of his first L, Nico is out for vengeance and has the most projected points for this week. On one hand, Purdy and Gibbs have been huge and Kyren Williams gets Las Vegas but I’m a bit wary of the WR corps of Jordan and Germie, who sound like a British sit-com about a call girl and her pimp. Johnny’s chance at an upset relies on Kenneth Walker having a huge revenge game against the Seahawks but I’m not seeing that happening.
PICK: NICO

Mark vs. Yurk
Financial experts say that you should never try to time the market. Fantasy experts should say something similar - you should never try to time Jaylen Waddle’s big games but I’m gonna do it and predict that Waddle goes off this week. All signs point to benching him - he’s banged up and the Broncos’ offense is a disaster but when all signs say to bench him, that’s when Waddle goes boom. The only red flag is the green flag that is Arizona’s pass defense. Next week, Waddle goes against the Chiefs #1 defense against WRs (per ESPN) so that might be the go spot.
Either way, Mark got his first W last week and he’s strutting into this week as the favorite against Yurk and who I to bet against this kind of momentum?
PICK: MARK

Dana vs Derek
While I am betting the under on Derek’s team this week, I still don’t think his brother from another mother is going to be able to take advantage of that. When you’re relying on Ollie Gordon and Malachi Fields (who sound like supporting characters on the BBC’s “Jordan & Germie”) then odds aren’t great that this will be Dana’s week to finally get a win. As for the show, I think Ollie is probably the bumbling friend and Malachi is the lothario neighbor who is secretly in love with Jordan.
PICK: DEREK

Brendan vs. Brett
This game is wide open. Stafford should be able to put up numbers against the Raiders - do you think there will be more Rams fans a the game in Vegas than there would have been if the game was played at SoFi? - but I kind of hate most of his other matchups. Brett’s lineup isn’t all that impressive but I feel like Golden and Allen could pop for him. Neither team has a full lineup right now but I’m going to go with Brett on this one because he needs a win after the Iggles’s rough week.
PICK: BRETT

Colin vs. Bernie
I’m not wild about either of these teams this week but Drake Maye should be able to throw for 400 yards against Chicago’s crap secondary… if he can get any time behind a o-line that is in shambles. And while I hate to pick against Kirk Cousins, the Rams have to show some pride this week and should shut him down.
PICK: BERNIE

Rahul vs. Eric
As much as I admire Rahul for standing strong and broadcasting the truth about people who broadcast their opinions from their makeshift garage/studio, I am starting to wonder if anyone realizes that they are allowed to change their names after a win. Has anyone changed their name besides Mark, who had to change it because he lost a second game by 50? Is the confusion over which kind of win allows a reset holding people back from returning to their original moniker? (I know that’s why The Gentleman hasn’t gone back.) Inquiring minds want to know!
As for the sports that are happening here, this could be a surprisingly high scoring affair as both team have nice matchups. The key will likely come down to the QB position where I see Caleb Williams doing more on Thursday night than Patrick Mahomes is going to be able to muster against the Seahawks. Saquon returning against the ‘Boys could help but, on the flip side, Jordan Mason may be back so the days of Aaron Jones being the Vikes’ bellcow could be done. I think this will be closer than Watson is predicting but the result will be the same.
PICK: ERIC